The Weight On Your Pillow
Don’t take tomorrow to bed with you…
As I walk through the valley in the shadow of death,
I will fear nothing, for thou art with me.
I practically know that I am walking through my death sentence. Finals is fast approaching, and I am doing anything and everything, except for studying. This excessive expenditure of worry is tiring and wearing me out.
My keyword for today is WORRY.
So what if I stopped writing now and proceeded to study?
So what if I deactivate my facebook account to devote all my time for school?
So what if I stop procrastinating and start focusing?
So what if I stopped ranting and worrying about how I haven’t yet studied and just proceed to do what I must actually do?
Would it stop my worry?
I’ve always dreamed of a day when I wouldn’t take my worries to bed, and wake up the next morning feeling so sure of myself and the day I was going to face.
Instead, I worry the night before about the test I am supposed to study, I wake up the next morning worrying about the upcoming exams, I worry about the jeepney ride I am going to take, I worry about my safety. It goes on and on and it doesn’t even stop anywhere.
So my fast paced life took a screeching stop and slapped me in the face. Why worry, when worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy.
I slowly felt like what I am doing lately made no sense at all. No purpose, and then somehow, my days seemed vastly unimportant and futile. Days are then translated to life, and darn, who would want to live a life with nothing to show for?
My anxiety hasn’t stopped and it took me a good deal of time to realize what I must have done a long time ago. If only I thought less with my mind and let my brain lead my hands to work, then I would’ve accomplished a lot of things.
I always believed in the mantra “Mind over Matter”. But it’s easier said than done. Somehow, our mind has a mind of its own. No matter how hard you convince yourself to start doing something that you’ve been putting off for months or weeks now, you somehow slowly drift off to time consuming activities that eats up not only your drive but also your decisiveness in doing something you must have.
If we keep worrying about the “tomorrows” then our “todays” are for nothing. Why not do today what we can do tomorrow and replace the word “tomorrow” with “now”
I will sleep properly “now”
I will study “now”
I will spend quality time with my family “now”
I will allot a time for prayer “now”
With this shift of attitude, you will see a drastic change in the panorama of life. Live happier, be fulfilled, for each passing day is a new gift for you to start anew. Everyday is a present, and let tomorrow worry about itself.
For the first time in a long time, I lay myself to sleep at night with a lighter soul on a soft pillow, waking up everyday with a gratifying feeling in my heart and a positive outlook on my days to come.
1st photo by : “Dianne” http://lakesidelane.wordpress.com